Will you take my teen’s side or the parent’s side?

No. My role is to be fair, direct, and supportive to everyone involved, helping families work together more effectively.

How involved are parents in therapy?

Parents play an important role. Involvement may include check-ins, joint sessions, or guidance around communication and expectations, depending on what’s most helpful.

Is therapy just a place for teens to vent?

Therapy includes emotional support, but it also focuses on accountability, communication, and skills that lead to real change.

Do you work with teens who have ADHD or are neurodivergent?

Yes. I work with neurodivergent teens and young adults, including those with ADHD, with a focus on emotional regulation, responsibility, and self-understanding. Many of the adolescents I work with are neurodivergent or have ADHD. Therapy focuses on understanding how their brain works, building practical skills, and addressing the emotional impact of school, expectations, and relationships.

Relationship Concerns Therapy
with Jacob Nathan, LSW

Honest, practical therapy for relationship stress, communication problems, and major relationship decisions.

Relationship problems are rarely just about one argument or one bad week. More often, something keeps repeating. Communication breaks down. The same conflict shows up in different forms. You feel anxious, disconnected, stuck, or unsure whether the relationship is moving in the direction you want. Sometimes the issue is dating. Sometimes it is commitment. Sometimes it is trying to figure out whether to get married, have kids, or build a future together.

I work with adults dealing with relationship concerns, communication problems, dating stress, commitment anxiety, infidelity, sexual performance issues, and major relationship decisions. I also work with couples who feel stuck and want help sorting through what each person wants, what is getting in the way, and what direction actually makes sense. I am especially interested in communication, miscommunication, and the gap between what people think they are saying and what the other person is actually hearing.

Why Relationship Concerns Feel So Hard

Relationships touch some of the most important parts of life: trust, identity, attachment, sex, family, and the future. That is one reason relationship stress can feel so consuming. Even when the issue seems small on the surface, it often carries bigger fears underneath. Am I asking too much? Am I settling? Am I overthinking this? Am I making the wrong choice? Should I stay? Should I go?

I see this all the time. Relationship stress can show up as anxiety, overthinking, avoidance, irritability, emotional distance, people-pleasing, conflict, or the feeling that you are constantly trying to read the other person without ever getting clear. A lot of people are not just trying to understand the relationship. They are trying to understand themselves inside the relationship.

Communication and Miscommunication

One of the things I find most interesting in therapy is communication and miscommunication. A lot of people are not only reacting to what was said. They are reacting to what they think it meant, what they fear it implied, or what old pattern got activated underneath it. That is part of why relationship concerns can feel so repetitive. The surface issue changes, but the emotional structure underneath it stays the same.

I work directly with that. I help people slow things down, get more honest about what they are actually feeling, and look at the difference between what is being said, what is being heard, and what is being assumed. That can be useful whether you are dating, in a long-term relationship, trying to make a major decision, or feeling like the same patterns keep showing up.

Pre-Proposal Counseling

A lot of people spend years in a relationship and then hit a wall around commitment. Maybe you have been together for eight years or ten years. Maybe the relationship works on a day-to-day level, but you are not sure whether you actually want to get married. Maybe you feel pressure from family, age, culture, or the simple fact that it seems like you should know by now.

I work with people and couples on exactly that kind of question. Pre-proposal counseling is not the same as premarital counseling. It is for the stage before a proposal, when you are trying to figure out whether this relationship is built on real fit, real desire, and real forward movement, or whether you are staying because you are comfortable, scared, or avoiding the hard questions. I help people assess both themselves and the relationship more honestly so they can sort out whether the anxiety is normal fear of a big decision or a sign that something deeper needs attention.

Big Decisions: Marriage, Kids, or the Future

A lot of relationship concerns center around major decisions. Do we want to get married? Do we want kids? Are we actually building the same kind of life? Are we moving forward because it fits, or because it feels easier than stopping? These are not small questions, and they usually do not get clearer just by waiting longer and hoping certainty shows up on its own.

I work with individuals and couples who feel stuck around these decisions. My job is not to push you toward yes or no. My job is to help you explore your options, understand what each person wants, and look closely at what may be keeping you stuck. That can include fear, comfort, family pressure, conflict avoidance, uncertainty, or unresolved problems in the relationship itself.

Individual Therapy and Couples Therapy

A lot of relationship work can happen in individual therapy. Sometimes one person wants to understand why they keep choosing the same kind of partner, why they struggle with conflict, or why they feel so anxious inside relationships. Sometimes an individual is trying to sort out whether they want to stay, leave, commit, or change how they show up. That kind of work matters because relationship patterns do not usually stay contained to one relationship.

I also work with couples, especially when the concern is communication, conflict, commitment, or a major decision about the future. In couples work, I am not there to simply referee arguments. I want to help both people understand what is happening between them, what each person wants, what each person fears, and what may be keeping the relationship from moving forward clearly.

My Partner Thinks I Need Therapy. Can You Help?

Yes. This is a very common reason people start individual therapy. Sometimes a partner is saying that communication is not working, conflict keeps repeating, or couples counseling has made it clear that individual therapy would help too. I work with men or anyone who appreciates a direct, interactive, conversational style of therapy. As a man, I also understand how many men are taught to deal with stress, conflict, emotion, and responsibility in ways that can create problems in relationships without meaning to.

I do a lot of work in this area. Sometimes the focus is on communication, emotional awareness, conflict, defensiveness, giving too much advice, or the ways masculinity can shape how someone shows up in a relationship. Sometimes the issue is how to support a partner who is struggling while still setting healthy boundaries and not losing yourself in the process. I help people understand what is happening, take responsibility where they need to, communicate more clearly, and show up in relationships in a way that is steadier, more honest, and more useful.

My Approach to Relationship Concerns Therapy

My style is collaborative, conversational, and direct. I want this work to feel like a real conversation, not a vague place where you say the same things over and over without getting clearer. I ask a lot of questions, bring ideas into the room, and help people look at what is happening underneath the obvious conflict. That may include anxiety, avoidance, fear of disappointing someone, difficulty trusting yourself, old relationship patterns, or a mismatch between comfort and actual fit.

I also think relationship work needs to be practical. I do not want therapy to stay abstract. I want to help people understand how they communicate, what they are asking for, what they are afraid of, and what options are actually in front of them. My goal is not to force clarity before it is ready. My goal is to help people get honest enough that the next step becomes easier to see.

How Relationship Concerns Therapy Can Help

understand why the same relationship patterns keep repeating
improve communication and reduce miscommunication
work through dating anxiety, commitment anxiety, and fear of making the wrong choice
sort through major decisions about marriage, kids, or the future
work through infidelity, betrayal, and trust issues
address sexual performance anxiety and the shame or pressure that often comes with it
clarify what you want in a relationship and how you tend to show up in one
make relationship decisions from a more thoughtful and grounded place

How I Help with Relationship Concerns at Modern Therapy Alliance

I do not treat relationship concerns as just isolated disagreements. I look at the broader pattern. Relationship stress often connects to anxiety, identity issues, life transitions, family expectations, work stress, and the old stories people carry about love, conflict, commitment, and being chosen. I want to help people understand those connections so the work leads to real clarity instead of temporary relief.

For some people, that means understanding why they keep circling the same decision. For others, it means finally slowing down enough to say what they really want and what they are really afraid of. I work in a straightforward, collaborative way because I want therapy to actually move.

Is Relationship Concerns Therapy with Jacob a Good Fit?

I am a strong fit for adults and couples who feel stuck, confused, anxious, or disconnected in relationships and want more than generic advice. You do not need to have everything figured out before starting, but it helps if you are willing to look honestly at your patterns, your communication, and the decisions you are facing.

I work especially well with people dealing with communication problems, commitment questions, major relationship decisions, dating stress, infidelity, sexual performance anxiety, and the feeling that they are not sure whether they are building the right kind of life with the person they are with. If you want thoughtful, direct, collaborative therapy for relationship concerns, this may be a good fit.

Related Services

Frequently Asked Questions About Relationship Concerns Therapy

Do you work with individuals, couples, or both?

I work with both. A lot of relationship work happens in individual therapy, especially when someone is trying to understand their own patterns, anxiety, or decisions. I also work with couples who feel stuck around communication, conflict, commitment, infidelity, or important choices about the future.

Can you help my partner and me make an important decision?

Yes. I work with couples who feel stuck around major relationship decisions like whether to get married, whether to have kids, whether to stay together, or whether they are truly moving toward the same life. I help partners explore their options, understand what each person wants, and look closely at what may be keeping them stuck.

What is pre-proposal counseling?

Pre-proposal counseling is for people who are not yet engaged but are trying to figure out whether they want to get married. It is different from premarital counseling. This work helps people sort out whether they are moving toward marriage because it fits, or staying in uncertainty because they are comfortable, anxious, or afraid to ask the hard questions.

Do you help with communication problems?

Yes. Communication and miscommunication are some of the main things I help with. A lot of people are not just arguing about the topic on the surface. They are reacting to fear, assumption, old patterns, and what they think the other person means. Therapy can help make that clearer.

What if I am not sure whether I want to stay in the relationship?

That is a completely valid reason to come to therapy. You do not need to wait until you are certain. Therapy can help you understand what is making the decision hard, what you are afraid of, and whether the relationship still fits the life you want.

Do you help with anxiety inside relationships?

Yes. A lot of relationship concerns involve anxiety, especially around commitment, conflict, communication, abandonment, or making the wrong choice. Therapy can help you understand those patterns and respond more clearly instead of reacting from fear.

Do you work with people dealing with infidelity?

Yes. I work with individuals and couples dealing with infidelity, betrayal, trust issues, and the fallout that comes after an affair or breach of trust. That can include deciding whether to stay, whether to leave, how to rebuild trust, and how to understand what happened without getting stuck in the same painful loop. My goal is to help people slow things down, get honest, and make thoughtful decisions instead of purely reactive ones.

Do you work with people who have sexual performance issues?

Yes. I work with people dealing with sexual performance anxiety, erectile difficulties, anxiety around sex, avoidance, shame, and the relationship stress that often comes with those issues. In therapy, I help people understand the anxiety, pressure, self-consciousness, or communication problems that may be making the issue worse. The goal is not just symptom relief. It is to reduce shame, improve communication, and help sex feel less driven by fear and pressure.

Can you help me with online dating?

Yes. I work with people who feel overwhelmed, discouraged, anxious, or burned out by online dating. That can include trouble knowing what you want, repeating the same dating patterns, overthinking texts and mixed signals, dating app fatigue, or feeling like dating is hurting your confidence. Therapy can help you approach online dating more clearly, set better boundaries, and make decisions that fit the kind of relationship you actually want.

Ready to Start Relationship Concerns Therapy?

You do not have to sort through relationship confusion, communication problems, infidelity, sexual performance issues, or major decisions on your own. If you are looking for relationship concerns therapy in Chicago that is practical, direct, and collaborative, I would be glad to talk with you. Reach out for a consultation and we can start figuring out what is happening, what is keeping you stuck, and what needs to happen next.

Relationship Concerns Therapy with Jacob Nathan, LSW